December 15, 2013

To write

I have not written here since May of 2012, and today I am here to say that I am going to start writing again. Creating again. I have been so busy traveling and trying to make enough money to pay my bills I have found myself believing that I am too tired to write, too tired to be creative. Years ago, when I was initially writing the book I wrote out of necessity. I wrote because I couldn’t breathe until I did. I wrote because it kept me moving forward and not stuck in the intangible circling images, thoughts and feelings in my head. Now I find myself needing it again. I spend my days at work feeling stuck and stagnant. Not growing. But I have realized it is my lack of creativity. My lack of art. I cannot live without creating and it has been too long. My rising anxiety levels tell me it is time to move forward in my life. I am getting closer to graduate school, and recently got accepted to Brown’s Executive Master of Healthcare Leadership program. But I cannot do this alone. I can’t do advocacy without art, activism without creativity. So, today I have decided to write again. To take photographs again. To allow myself to think deeper and express myself on paper rather than become paralyzed by emotions I cannot convey in my head alone.